Mish Mash

Tested

I found out last week that my brain is neither male nor female, but perfectly neutral. I took a 6-part Brain Sex ID test on the Science and Nature section of BBC's website.

I found out:

• that I am good at identifying people's emotions by their eyes (perfect score)
• that I prefer male faces with more feminine traits
• that men (and me) generally have a ring finger that is longer than their index finger, which gives them a lower ratio than women, whose ring and index fingers are usually of equal length. "It's thought that the ratio is governed by the amount of testosterone you were exposed to in your mother's womb. Studies have found that men and women with lots of brothers generally have more masculine finger ratio."
• that men have the lowest levels of testosterone in the springtime.
• that, on average, women use 15,000 words a day while men use 7,000.
  "Women took about twice as long as men to end their online instant messenging conversations in a 2003 study of US university students. The study, which was published in the Journal of Language and Social Psychology, also found that women were much more likely to use emoticons (representations of emotions using punctuation marks). The most popular emoticon was the smiley face :- ) "

I also took the How Disgusting quiz, where you rate disgusted you are by various pictures. "This experiment was designed to test the theory that disgust evolved to protect us from disease. The more something resembles a disease threat, the more disgusting it should be."

A Winning Weekend

Friday night (Happy Birthday, Tyler!) I was in a bit of an anti-social mood, but managed to rally a bit for a few hands of poker. I'd seen Texas Hold'em on late night TV in the States, but this was my first time to play. No money changed hands. Pete kept up his role from the Murder Mystery party of being a drunk-losing-gambler, but no suspenders this time. : )

On Saturday, I had great success shopping for Christmas presents (already know what's to be had at the market, so hit up the nice stores/craft galleries). We went to the new A&C Shopping Mall, which is unlike anything I've ever seen in Ghana before. I think I could safely say it was like going to Disneyworld: Ben&Jerry's at the supermarket; Victoria's Secret at the store upstairs; "The Scoop," which only sells soy-based ice cream; a huge kiddie play area; a roller-blade/skateboard skate ramp; parking spots delineated by painted lines. And to think you have to go way out to the 'Burbs and then down a dirt road to get there...Follow the yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road!!! (Now I'm mixing my metaphors!)

Ended the afternoon with a great lunch at the Orangery: pumpkin soup and crabbed cream crepe (say THAT, or my other favorite 'pasta with prawns, pinenuts and peppers,' 10 times fast. I attempted to watch a coworker's burnt DVD of Labyrithn (David Bowie, very old school), which unfortunately it didn't work. I made brownies! and had a yummy chicken-mango-avocado salad for dinner. Jane bought us a backgammon board at a garage sale (so now we don't have to use the cardboard one I made, which is good because without dice, we were left to draw numbers from a cup). I headed over to Annie's to sleep peacefully (no water at our house from Thursday night to Monday morning).

I woke up well-rested Sunday morning, having dreamt that I went to get my hair cut and the woman chopped it to college-length-spikes; I was in a tizzy because that meant no one at home would see my luscious locks. Annie and I leisurely got ready to go to the beach, snacking on fresh fruit, Japanese rice crackers and some cream cheese spread, plus she made us eggs and I got Roobis tea. We headed to the beach and had no traffic problems and since Annie was driving, I could request a pee break, no problemo! The perks of non-tro-tro travel. We arrived at the same time as our other friends and we spent the day sun-burn free. No traffic problems on the return, either. Another hot shower and some leftovers, and I was ready to crash.

It was a fabulous weekend!

And I heard that Yale beat Harvard in a triple-overtime battle, 30-24. Yea, Bulldogs!

On the Move

I leave tomorrow morning for Guinea on a 10-day work trip to interview/process refugees (mostly Liberian and Sierra Leonians). I'll be working through Thanksgiving, my first sans turkey (at least I got to celebrate Canadian Thanksgiving last month). Enjoy the food and spending time with your loved ones!

Playtime

The Murder Mystery Dinner was a grand success, thanks to Jane and Annie! Everyone got really into it and showed up with great costumes.




I was Carrie Crooner-Ravioli, a 19 year old aspiring singer and the new wife of the Godfather character. Tyler was Mayor Bill Bumpkin and put on some pounds for the role, uglified himself with a carsalesman-type mustache, and used a jolly politician voice throughout the evening.



Contrary to what Jane said, I knew I didn’t HAVE to perform, but figured I might as well have some fun…I even got to do a costume change before dancing to Madonna’s "I’m Going Bananas" (complete with banana prop).

Ad lib: "Oh no! I'm pregnant and now my baby won't have a father!"

Thanks so much, Annie and Jane!

For more photos, go to Jane's blog.

Tyler's Guest Blog (I'll resist the temptation to editorialize!)

Jill's apartment has two doors--one wooden that locks with a bolt and another outside of that, which is big, heavy, iron and locked with a padlock (there's a big hole so you can reach around and lock/unlock it even if you're locked up behind it). It was this big, heavy, iron door that Jill used to slam my right thumb while I was trying to close the padlock. She seemed genuinely apologetic. But on Saturday she won the "Best Actress" award at the murder mystery party that her friend threw, so one never can tell.

Those of you who read this blog regularly (or at least have read the blog entry announcing my arrival--look for the orange, btw), may want to know what I think of Ghana. I'm going to have some very nice words to say. But I know some of you don't want nice words. You want blood and bad luck.

Doh! One of Tyler's many injuries.

For you sickos, I will answer the following Frequently Asked Questions:

Did you find the passport you lost ten minutes after arriving in Accra?
No. But I did have the opportunity to spend hours upon hours at the American Embassy. When you're in an American embassy, you are technically on American soil, so the following comments are not to be applied to the friendly people of Ghana.

1. American embassies generate their electricity by moving people through lines; you are always sure to see long queues at American embassies. As an American national, you'll have it a bit easier than everyone else, though, and can skip a number of the longer lines. Possibly because of this, the embassy will require you to come back at least four separate times. Some of these visits will take several hours.

2. The woman at the window that you have to see when you check-in is sure to have a mental breakdown because there are as many as FOUR people crowding around her window to ask why nothing is happening and no one has taken their names or given them a number. You might note that mental breakdowns are not conducive to efficient service. You might also note that none of the people around the window are really all that high pressure and that she only really has to deal with them from 8am-noon M-F.

3. American embassies insist that you fill out forms at one place, then trek far away to a cashier who will be either a) leaving an hour earlier than all other services close, or b) missing for over an hour (no backups apparently can be found, either). (I was fortunate enough to experience both.) You will then need to trek back to the first place, though to get there you will have to leave the embassy and make your way through the line and back into the embassy. (As an American you can cut in line, though.)

4. American embassies are remarkable for their inefficiency. I think this comes from an inability to communicate and execute. A harsher fellow might call American embassies "incompetent". I, personally, wouldn't say that because diplomats might then point out that it isn't really all that competent to lose your passport ten minutes after stepping foot out of the airport.

How many injuries have you sustained in Ghana?
Most of my injuries are on the right side of my body:
- Above my big toe is a deep gash that came from falling down the stairs the first night. This was reinjured when I slipped on the rocks near the waterfall last weekend.
- On the outside of the foot is a cut from a sharp, rusty piece of metal poking out of a seat in a tro-tro. Tro-tros are minivans that are packed with 20 people for commuting and extricating yourself from the far back involves a lot of squeezing and brushing up against people, poultry and pokeybits.
- My ankle is turned from the fall down the spiral staircase that first night and there is an open wound there, too. For what it's worth, I twisted it again stepping off the curb three days ago.
- My thumb was slammed in the door. (It was big, heavy and iron. The door, not my thumb.)
- My forearm has a largeish sandburn from getting knocked down by a giant wave and dragged along the bottom of the ocean floor. Last weekend Jill and I traveled all around the eastern part of the country and spent a day on a beautiful beach that had fantastic warm water where I could body surf. Except that I'm not really all that good at body surfing, I guess. My rule of bruised thumb is to leave the ocean once you start bleeding. This is probably the thing that hurts the most (except for my ankle when I'm hiking up 45 degree inclines). I'm still pretty forgetful of it, so it bumps up against things a lot, I'm hoping I don't have sand stuck in me subcutaneously.
Non-right-side items of note:
- Something (my malaria medication, the dust and sweat?) has really made my forehead breakout in a billion pimples.
- I got a sunburn on my shoulders but it's better now.
- I also scraped my left knee in the body surfing expedition. It's pretty healed, too.
- Last Monday night/Tuesday day I was sick with a "running tummy". Except that it wasn't really my tummy that was running. Jill took very good care of me. Checked me into a hotel so I could have a shower and airconditioning and no one to bother me. She was very swell and made me toast, too.

Truth be told, it's been a nice trip and Jill has been remarkable. I have frankly been far too lazy and she has done a great job handling nearly all of the logistics. She feels it's her responsibility to handle these sorts of things and it certainly has been appreciated.

Some notes of interest:
- Ghana is hot. Damn hot.
- It's a green place.
- Everyone sucks water from plastic sachets all of the time. Sachets are squareish, plastic bags of water. Sadly, everyone just throws these sachets on the ground when they are done.
- The pineapples are pretty good. The grilled plantains are yummy. Other good dishes: red-red and palaver. I'll make Jill explain them.
- The folks are friendly. Except in customer service. The customer service is dour.
- Everyone snaps fingers as the conclusion to a handshake. (That is, the handshakes end with you and the other person snapping.)
- Ewe is probably the most beautiful of the Ghanaian languages I heard.
- Guys get name-whistles that identify them (so you can call them when they're far off).
- Jill's English has degenerated to the point that it is unrecognizable.
- Still, she makes up in love, care, and thoughtfulness what she lacks in intelligible syntax.

Some of the best things:
- We took a tro-tro to the Volta region (Africa's largest reservior) and did a hike to a waterfall--a hilltop jungle that you enter from a hilltop village. The village was really neat. I hope we can put up some pictures. The layout was really conducive to community, I think. The hike was great and we saw a column of enormous, angry army ants (you leave the path and avoid army ants--you do not step on them or near them). There were some butterflies, too. The waterfall was nice and there was a little cave with an enormous chimney that we went in, too. The bats that had been there moved out when the villagers started bothering them. Apparently bat-meat is tasty, btw. We weren't offered any ourselves.

Wisdom, Papa and Tyler in Tota before our waterFALL hike

- I'm not actually a big beach person, but I do love swimming in warm water.
- The night before I got rode-slash-got-pummeled by the waves, we ate barracuda. I thought it was quite tasty, though I might have gotten sick because of it and we did have to fight with the place about the bill. We ate it on a deck overlooking the estuary at dusk. That was pretty neat.
- Jill's friend Jane organized a murder mystery party on Saturday night that was a 1920s gangsta affair. I was a mayor and had a pretty fun time of it. I had been growing a beard so I shaved it to make it into a mustache. Boy, do I look weasly with a mustache. But the mustache grew on me a little and by the time of the party I thought, hey, this isn't so untrustworthy. It's kinda sexy in a Village People sort of way. Jill was ashamed of it, though, and every introduction on Saturday was: "Hi, this is my brother, he doesn't normally have a mustache, doesn't he look terrible with it?" I only had the mustache on Saturday, I was forced to shave it on Sunday morning.

"Please, he doesn't usually look so shady and sleazy!"

- Yesterday (Sunday) we took a hike to Shai Hills and saw baboons, crocodiles and an antelope. The crocs were small, but on our way back to the car we got to see one chomping on a bird. Yum. It was a long hike, but a good one. There were some fantastic bird calls. One sounded like a real song: do-dee-do. (Jill, you might need to podcast this blog.) Up to now, Chile's had the best bird calls. I think Ghana is up there now, too. The hike started with rain but soon got pretty hot. Green savannah hiking from flat land up to the top of a hill. As we were in the last leg, my phone beeped to say I got a text message. This was exciting because it was Gus's birthday. Jill and I had a rule of no phones while on nature hikes, so I couldn't check it til the end. But anticipation is pretty nice. And then there was a cool breeze. Those two things make a fellow pretty happy here.

Rain couldn't stop us (but nearly stopped our wussy guide)

- One of the main streets is lined with trees from which millions of bats hang. It's really cool to see them there, like dark fruits...or flying in circles at dusk.
- Two missed events: we were foiled the other weekend by timing and opted out of going to a fetish priest; this weekend we got caught in a downpour and had to skip the orphanage Jill worked at. I guess I'll have to come back!

Time Waster

I know you expect me to write about all the fun Tyler and I are having (and secretly harboring desires to hear about further catastrophes, you evil, evil people!).

I tried to blog about our weekend yesterday and I'm just not in the writing mood. It'll come (hopefully Tyler will make good on his promise to do a Guest Blog). I've also got to take more pictures and then post them (did I tell you how a Canadian girl new to Accra recognized me at a local bar from my pictures on here?! A wee bit disturbing).

How have I spent my days at work while Tyler is out trapsing about Accra on his own?

Today:

I read about the Pitcairn Island trials (Pacific island with population 47, half the island's men were tried by British for sexual abuse, eg sleeping with girls as young as 12. (Some) locals claimed a) this was their cultural practice and b) that the UK had no jurisdiction over them.)

Jonestown Massacre (I didn't know that the whole kool-aid suicide thing happened in Guyana or that a US Rep was killed when he went to investigate on behalf of his constituents' with family members in the cult.)

Geoquiz (My scores: a 149 on Africa, 82 on Asia, 80 for the Middle East and 138 in the US. How'd you do?)

Best of Craig's List: Office wide entertainment tactic. Didn't find that many I liked, but yesterday was amused by "bleeding heart liberal seeks sperm donor for abortion" (before Supreme Court outlaws it). Tyler recommended one he remembered from years ago: a personal ad from a 100% genetically Asian woman.

No more looking at the calendar or searching for flights: plane tickets bought for Christmas. Accra-Cairo(transit)-NYC(2 nights, hope somebody will meet me at the airport with a winter coat!)-Iowa. Home from Dec 18-Jan 7. NYC for a day, Egypt for some time (depends on how much vacation time I have accumulated by then), and then back to Ghana.

And today I've got headphones and the blessing of music to make this Friday afternoon speed by a little bit faster. And now a game of Internet Backgammon!

Visit!

My brother Tyler arrived last night!

(For skimmers, I've highlighted all Tyler's misfortunes from Day 1 in orange.)

2 worlds collide. I feel like somehow my existence here is verified or legitimized by having a family member bear witness. I like knowing that, in the future, I can make references to things and know he's seen the place, met the people.

He told me last week that he'd be coming Nov 3-14th. What a great surprise sneak attack! I can't officially take off vacation time because I'm in my 3 month probation period, but I can be 'sick' for a day or two.

Tyler's horoscope for yesterday: If you're not on the move right now, you'll wish you were, and with a partner by your side (ME!). And today: Life is full of unexpected adventures -- why not get caught up in the moment?

~~~~~~~~~~~

Ever read that book Alexander's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day?
As Alexander learns, some days are like that, "Even in Australia." Especially in Africa.

Tyler texted me Wednesday from the SF airport: United wouldn't check him through the whole way without a visa (even though he could get one on arrival at the Accra airport) and it would have been cutting it close with such a tight connection in Frankfurt and a checked bag. Luckily a Lufthansa agent-angel just stuck him on their flight the whole way, even giving him an aisle bulk head seat and waiving the change fee. (Disaster averted--or at least, postponed.)

Then Tyler cut his finger running through the airport to catch the flight.

I am sure he fretted the whole way there about whether he really could get a visa at the airport (I know I was secretly worried; hence not blogging my excitement that he'd be coming before he arrived in case I should jinx it.)

The flight was scheduled to come at 6:25 pm. Annie and I pulled up at 7:10ish after calculating it would take him that long to get through immigration and collect his bag (and being slightly delayed by traffic). I saw him exiting and ran the last 15 steps so that I was right there when he got to the end of the fenced off area. Whew, just in time.

We got home only to discover that Tyler couldn't open the suitcase he'd brought, sure that the combination lock had been set at0-0-0 and maliciously changed by the security guards in the US that require you to leave luggage unlocked...

Tyler THEN discovered he didn't have his passport. Lost or stolen, we don't really know.

Holy Saint Anthony...

We checked the house, the car, and then Annie was kind enough to take us BACK to the airport. We looked around the parking lot, talked to the parking attendants and security: no dice. We waltzed through security at the airport exit (easier than when Jane lost her baggage) and checked with the customs official, who assured us she'd handed it back to Tyler. We checked at Information and Lost & Found. They made a PA annoucement and I left my telephone number with anyone and everyone in case it should turn up.

Back outside, Annie was doing her own investigation and trying to track down the shifty-eyed guy who had tried to help Tyler with his bag (help we didn't request, didn't need, and didn't reward). We spotted him just after we'd put our validated parking ticket into the machine and the mechanical parking lot arm went up. But we pulled over to talk to the guy (we wanted to frisk him, but didn't think that'd go over too well). Then the arm went down and we couldn't get out. So, Annie had to 'park well' while I went back to the office to explain what had happened and get us a way to get out. Meanwhile, Annie sat with the parking attendents and the shifty-eyed guy, trying to gauge if he had the passport and could be bribed to get it back. "My all means, if a good person found it, they will bring it back," he claimed. Annie probed, saying that there were definitely 'bad people' who would be willing to buy a passport from 'other bad people,' trying to get across that we, too, would pay. But the man wouldn't admit that there were bad people.

The IT guy had to come back with me to open the arm, but as Annie fumbled to find her business card, it timed out again and he had to open it again. She handed her card to the IT guy (though it was intended more for shifty-eyed guy who was seated nearby), who called her several hours later. He didn't offer any information and it might have just been that he was calling to chat her up.

Annie dropped us off at Epo Spot, a local Ghanaian outdoor bar with a nearby chop bar. Tyler wanted Ghanaian food, so I gave him Chicken and Rice. We had some ice cream on the way home and I came the closest I've ever come to almost falling into a gutter (one of my all-time fears).

At home, we managed to open the luggage with one of three security code alternatives provided by the co-owner of the suitcase. I got just what I requested: granola, two Arabic textbooks, and a CD of pictures from our South Africa trip (but no Swiss Cake Rolls!).

Even the rain wasn't stopping the Thursday night live music coming from our backyard bar, so we packed an overnight bag to go sleep at Annie's.

Tyler slid down part of our concrete spiral staircase and scrapped up his leg.

We got to Annie's and, miraculously, my key worked. Hot water, A/C, peace and quiet. Collapse. Thanks, Annie!

All I have to say about the bad luck is: it's not even mercury retrograde!

NOTE: this post pending approval. Hope you all read it before Tyler makes me take it down! :D

Halloween

This is the first year I got excited about Halloween in a long time---and that was only after a Google Search led me to:

A stick in the mud (wear brown, attach stick)
Someone to count on (wear cut-outs of numbers attached to clothes)
Devil's advocate (wear pins and signs that say "Go Devil!" and "Satan's #1!")
Tickled pink (wear pink and carry feather)

Friday night I was a lion, Jane a belly dancer and A. was "thirsty" (those are empty water sachets), but some people thought she was the tin man. I enjoyed ROARING at bewildered Ghanaians in the street between our house and the party place.

Saturday night I was "a catch." (No google, that was all me!) I realized half way through the night I could have been "caught red-handed" with a simple addition. (Randomness: there were 3 other Iowans living and working in Accra at this party!!!!!)

Dressing up the Roomie